“strong frame in front of a locomotive for removing obstructions such as stray cattle,” 1838

In the middle of the brutal unload this word occurred to me for reasons I can’t remember. I ended up explaining it to her, and reflecting that although I’ve doubtless used the word many times, I’ve never really reflected on its violence, its black humor, or how I came to know it.

Being a train engineer was the first thing I can ever remember wanting to be.

The driver at the helm of many tons of freight, human or not.

This week I’ve been just that, in the strange warped way that time makes our dreams come true.

I’m the original Casey Jones, and the Grateful Dead kind watching my speed, and the post-professoriate something-else that hauls.